Welcome to a bright new future here at the Rifftrax blog, a future that will include, among other things, actual posts by me, Mike Nelson. Yes, daily, hourly, perhaps evenly minutely and, very rarely, secondly, I will be posting my thoughts on pop culture, food, people’s haircuts, the works of 70’s oddity Michael J Pollard, long, dry treatises on Jacobean theater, a few sentences on why I hate blue cheese, and many other important and relevant topics.
Honestly, though, it will largely focus on hats. It would be called Hat Blog if I had my way. But no – the heartless money men behind the scenes here at Rifftrax dog piled me in a meeting, dangled loogies in my face and flicked my head repeatedly until I promised not to call it Hat Blog. (My ribs still hurt and the red mark on my forehead is just now beginning to fade.) Still, they can’t stop me from indulging my love of hats. I promise to provide you with an enormous amount of information on every kind of hat you can imagine, and a good deal of the fabulous hat designs I sketch in my spare time.
Joining me from time to time will be some special guests: familiar faces here at Rifftrax, as well as some surprises, fine and witty writers who, if we’re lucky, will hold forth for 40-50,000 words on their love of hats.
And finally, look for a steady stream of material from Rifftrax own Conor Lastowka. Conor has been a vital member of the Rifftrax team since day one, and if you’ve enjoyed a Rifftrax, you’ve enjoyed his fine writing as well as his behind-the-scenes machinations on all things Rifftrax. We’ve largely kept him a secret until now because, well, he’s also working for some CIA front or something, gathering intel on “something, something, blah blah blah” – I don’t know, I wasn’t really paying attention when he was explaining how it was critical that we not reveal his identity.
Hats, people. Hats.