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My Love is Like an Old, Old, um, Custard…

November 28th, 2007 by Mike Nelson · 5 Comments

[photopress:75014086_a09bb3de4e.jpg,thumb,alignleft]I offer you now an excerpt from a Rod McKuen poem I ran across titled “Rehearsal for a Sonnet on Your Body”:

…Were I a cardinal, a pope, a bishop used as pawn
I’d do you as a final prayer, then tucking you
beneath my arm be gone from church and
catechism contradiction and the dawn.


Comes now the taking of the wine and wafers.
Whose blood and body is it?
I leave the altar cowardly as week-old custard
crusty and with perspiration round my edges.

The choir goes crazy
chanting penance, penance.

(emphasis mine)

And I leave you with some advice: when penning ballads to your dearest love, avoid phrases like “I’d do you” and steer well clear of comparing anything in your poem to old rotting egg dishes.

Tags: RiffTrax

5 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Courtney on Nov 28, 2007 at 2:13 pm

    And maybe refrain from using the word “tucking.” Unless you just want to flat out tell your lady you want to eff her, stay away from that and any other word that ends in “ucking” because it is way too easy for the mind to read it differently. Plus I as a ladyperson would like NOT to be compared to blankets or blanketty things. No sir you may not tuck me anywhere. Thanks.

  • 2 Rob on Nov 28, 2007 at 3:06 pm

    gee, maybe thats why my ex left me after comparing our love to 3 week old eggnog with Baalut chaser…

  • 3 Neb on Nov 28, 2007 at 8:03 pm

    Gack. John Donne he ain’t.

  • 4 Tim on Nov 28, 2007 at 9:34 pm

    Personally, I can do without anyone telling me about the “perspiration” around their “edges”, whether referring to custard OR human beings.

    One’s edges should, by all decency, be kept to one’s self.

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