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Pegging the Creepitometer Needle

December 14th, 2007 by Kevin Murphy · 16 Comments

Sheer HorrorOne or the other by themselves garners a solid creepitometric reading (truthfully Mr. Top blows the curve by himself.) but in conjunction they caused the needle on my creepitometer to fuse in the red zone and blow six Russian vacuum tubes in the process. You need to tell me if this is simply a horrifying coincidence or the cynical act of an unkind God. I for one won’t sleep tonight.

Other posts by Kevin Murphy

Tags: Creepitometry · Kevin · RiffTrax · Riffer Blogs

16 responses so far ↓

  • 1 MB on Dec 14, 2007 at 6:19 pm

    I can’t help you, Mr. Murphy. I just saw “The Star Wars Holiday Special,” and my ability to judge that which is upsetting has been irrevocably destroyed.

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  • 2 Daisyj on Dec 14, 2007 at 10:09 pm

    I believe this is further proof that the apocalypse has already happened, and we are now living in the End Times.

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  • 3 Kleenex on Dec 14, 2007 at 10:40 pm

    Carrot Top performed last year at my company party. True story. Apparently, the CEO was a big fan. Best part was, everyone totally ignored him after they brought out the buffet and he was on stage for (what felt like) an hour. So Carrot Top was completely upstaged by chicken wings and Swedish meatballs. He started to get really annoyed about it too, I thought he was going to cry. I just picture him coming off stage after the show, punching a hole in his dressing room wall then crusing around town looking for a homeless person to kill out of frustration.

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  • 4 Eddie Colton on Dec 15, 2007 at 1:32 am

    Kevin, are you confused by the resemblence of Mr. Top to Ronald McDonald, a McDonald’s employee, a chicken McNugget, or all three?

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  • 5 customcartoons on Dec 15, 2007 at 3:23 am

    I’m surprised no one’s put their faces side by side earlier. I already see the dark, mutant cousin of Ronald McDonald every time I look at Carrot Top, so looking at this pair of pictures is no surprise to me.
    What I don’t get is his mascara. Or why he’s felt the need to totally buff out these past few years, tho the guns are lovely to look at. ;) Aw, man. Now my Creepometer is pinging….

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  • 6 Onil on Dec 15, 2007 at 5:17 am

    CarrotTop is the strongest argument for Intelligent Design because only a vengeful and spiteful creator could come up with him. Nature is far too benign and random for him to be considered even a genetic fluke.

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    Reply from MB on December 15, 2007:

    I often despair over Carrot Top, and not in the usual manner. He’s from Cocoa Beach, where I used to live, and I cannot imagine how a perfectly lovely place like Cocoa Beach could have produced him.

    P.S. Hi, Onil!

  • 7 Slade Rockfist on Dec 15, 2007 at 5:43 am

    Is it a horrifying coincidence that you and Mike both made blogs about the creepiness of Ronald McDonald, or was it a planned double-blogging?

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    Reply from MB on December 15, 2007:

    “double-blogging”

    Heh. It sounds all dirty, and stuff.

    Reply from customcartoons on December 17, 2007:

    Sounds like a police-report.

    “5′7″ Caucasian male, 5′3″ asian female, both victims of a double-blogging”

  • 8 Merat on Dec 15, 2007 at 7:59 am

    Is…is… Mr. Top there wearing eyeshadow? That blows the clown out of the water and the running, I’m afraid.

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  • 9 QuackersnCheese on Dec 15, 2007 at 11:05 am

    Actually if it were not for the obvious age difference I would almost believe Ron McDon was modeled after Mr. Top. Then again having seen Home Da Clown I know Mr. Top is his illigitamit child. Anyway you slice it Mr. Top has some strange dna floating around inside him.

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  • 10 MontyServo on Dec 15, 2007 at 2:22 pm

    I know it’s the “cool” thing to dis Carrot Top, but I saw his Vegas show a few years ago and actually enjoyed it.

    Yes, his act is pretty stupid. But at the same time, it is pretty funny. At least I thought so.

    I will agree that the new “buff” Carrot Top is pretty disturbing looking.

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  • 11 Jamie McLargeHuge on Dec 16, 2007 at 5:36 pm

    I think the creepiest thing about carrot top is the fact that he frequents the Bunny Ranch in Nevada. It’s a hizzore house. Can you imagine having to act like you’re enjoying him pawing all over you?
    I hope they charge him double.

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  • 12 ShutterBun on Dec 16, 2007 at 9:23 pm

    At least this event gives you an excuse to upgrade to a solid-state Creepitometer. I agree that the old tube versions gave “warmer” readings, but what we really should be striving for is accuracy, as well as reliability.

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    Reply from customcartoons on December 17, 2007:

    Isn’t Panasonic coming out with an HD Creepitometer next year? I hear the resolution is amazing.

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