The RiffTrax Blog is proud to offer our year-end List-Free Certification®. The LFC status is our bulletproof guarantee that you can stop by for your daily dose of carrot-based superheroes without ever being troubled by a day-ruining “Top Ten Celebrity Blunders of 2007″-style list.
We offer no guarantees explicit or implied about year-end Liszts, however. Here are my top 10:
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No.1, Old Woman Liszt: Hey, Gramma, where do you keep your Ensure? |
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No. 2, Foppy Liszt:”Oh… my GOD! You actually expect me to play that piano? Terrence, get our coats!” |
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No. 3, Predator Liszt: “I love women. I love to love them. And they love it.” |
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No. 4, Introspective Liszt: “I thought I would like that scrimshaw – but now I’m not so sure.” |
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No. 5, Gertrude Stein Liszt: “For the love of God, Chopin is a bigger puss than Hemingway!” |
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No.6, Impatient Liszt: “People please, take your snuff after I finish my fiendishly difficult transcriptions of Paginini’s Etudes“ |
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No. 7, Peevish Liszt: “I will not play a single Hungarian Rhapsody until you apologize for that crack about my girl hair!” |
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No. 8, Pensive Liszt: “Did I hit every note in the Mephisto Waltz last night? No. But I’m okay with that.” |
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No. 9, Warty Liszt: Um, this is the 19th century – you have heard of salicylic acid, haven’t you? |
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No. 10, Orlando Bloom IS Franz Liszt: And the Bayreuth 10th graders say, “He’s so dreamy because he looks just like me!” |
15 responses so far ↓
1 SarahCanuck on Dec 29, 2007 at 1:36 am
Heeeeeeee. I officially like year-end-Liszts far better than lists.
Hmm, Foppy Liszt’s sleeves are so gonna get in the way when he tries to play Grand Galop Chromatique.
2 Tim on Dec 29, 2007 at 2:02 am
May we include, as an honorable mention, “Winona Ryder Liszt”? She’s a shoe-in for a future biopic of Liszt (directed by Tim Burton)
3 Tim on Dec 29, 2007 at 2:04 am
Behold…Winona Ryder Liszt:
4 Tim on Dec 29, 2007 at 2:07 am
Here
5 Mr. Slick on Dec 29, 2007 at 8:22 am
I think in No.4 he looked alot like Lizzie Borden. Of course I think Kevin does too so I may be wrong.
6 Rufus T on Dec 29, 2007 at 4:03 pm
No. 6 looks like he is calling for another pint of IPA. It is pretty amazing that Listz was able to reverse his age and rename himself Rochmaninoff.
7 Cibernetico 2 on Dec 29, 2007 at 9:52 pm
umm what?
8 Jason Heath’s Double Bass Blog » links for 2008-01-05 on Jan 4, 2008 at 9:29 pm
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