…And I mean, EVER. For all of Rifftrax Blog history. Boggles the brain, no?
This post could ruin my authority as a riffclown, and may well jeopardize my membership in URP — the Union of Riffing Professionals. (I’m in Local 176.)
It could also get me kicked out of the band. I wouldn’t be surprised at all if Mike and Kevin shunned me after this, and really, I don’t think I could blame them. Worst of all, Mike might demand that I return the Composting Toilet he gave me for Christmas. My poor solids!
But there are times that a strong, brilliant man just has to unburden himself. And like those strong, brilliant men, sometimes I have to, also.
If you missed Confess Your Bad Taste (An Occasional Series), the first of these admissions of my crappy aesthetic sense, here it is. In it, I ‘fess up to liking (no: loving) the movie BILLY JACK, as well as the 80s Norwegian band A-HA’s song + video “Take on Me.”
I write this preamble just to let you know who you’re dealing with, here: a person of inconsistent — perhaps even nonexistent — taste. So…
In this edition, which might be the last, I confess to liking a whole bunch of movies from the very Rifftrax catalogue which comprises…um…Rifftrax’s catalogue!!
Bear in mind that I’m not talking simply about enjoying particularly delicious terrible movies here. For instance, along with Mike, I love ROAD HOUSE, but I never forget that I’m watching a cheese-fest.
Some of the movies below have laughably bad moments, too. But I can also get lost in other parts, and enjoy them as a movie fan. Perhaps a distinction without a difference, but…this is a blog, not a term paper. If it was the latter, I’d be asking for my fifth extension by now.
Without further ado, and simply in the order they first appeared in the catalogue….
RIFFTRAX MOVIES I LIKE
by soon-to-be-ex-riffer Bill Corbett
3) The Matrix
8 ) Fantastic Four
11) Independence Day
There you go.
Soon of these are pretty non-controversial, of course: I love the Lord of the Rings trilogy unabashedly, and almost weep like a damned hobbit at the mere mention of them. And Raiders of the Lost Ark is a great piece of moviemaking, even with its (in my humble opinion) silly face-melty ending.
Others on the list? Heh heh. Can’t really justify ‘em. I just enjoyed them, or at least big stretches of them… even when I realized that there was a lot of goofy stuff that came with the fun parts.
(NOTE: I haven’t seen every single offering in the Rifftrax catalogue,but I think it’s accurate to say I’ve seen most of them. So by and large, if it’s not on the list, I didn’t much enjoy sitting through it unriffed.)
Now: have at it, Spartans. Comment away, heap your scorn and abuse at will, make me brunch in Hell. If a riffclown can’t be mocked, then life makes no sense. I’d just like to repeat my no-cow head-sending request.
I may respond to a few comments. Or I might just hide in my coat closet… crying, hugging Paddington Bear and chugging a fifth of Scoresby.