…wondered if you had a cigarette?

Hang on, Pete just remembered that he was already smoking one, but can he still have the cigarette, for later, mate?

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State Quarter fest 2k8 continues! Check out all the previous entries here.

 
vs
It would be difficult to find two more contrasting quarters than South Carolina and Wyoming. South Carolina employs the “Throw everything at your quarter and see what sticks” method of design, whereas Wyoming didn’t even bother to fill in the [...]

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No, not these Titans:

I’m referring, of course, to Pauly Shore and Wes Craven:

These two Olympians of the film world are suing each other, and the rest of us can only look on and weep:
Pauly Shore Countersues Wes Craven
Thu Feb 21, 6:17 AM ET
LOS ANGELES – Pauly Shore is suing neighbor Wes Craven for [...]

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…for spending the afternoon with him, recalling the lost dreams of childhood.

You’ve made Joey Pants very happy. YOU.

Joey wanted to let you know that he is taking off his Pants and putting on an oversized cotton nightshirt, as well as his comfy overnight Kangol. A tiny humidor of overnight cigars sits on his bedside [...]

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Our last two posts, while funny, have been a tad risque for the Rifftrax blog.
So I thought it best that we all remember our basic sense of innocence and wonder, by enjoying this picture of Joey Pantoliano. Please come back with me to a time when dreams were real; when childlike [...]

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Here it is. In case you didn’t know, or had just lost interest in it until recently and were wondering where it is. Who knew? It’s about sixty miles west of St. John’s, just off the Trans-Canada Highway on the scenic Baccalieu Trail. It’s small, but quite pretty, and a pleasant distraction from the [...]

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In the midst of boxing up our things as we prepare to move into a new place after 3+ years, my girlfriend made an odd discovery last night. At the bottom of an Ikea flower pot that held spare keys, tape, nails and other random things, a little scrap of paper was sitting there:

Now, [...]

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“I… am… Beowulf!”
Heh. You’ve heard me yelling that a lot lately, haven’t you? Guilty as charged! But it’s true, I am Beowulf, and I’m darned proud of being Beowulf.

I’m so much more than this, really.

Since my recent blurted statements of self-identification have been so heavily focused on my Beowulf nature, [...]

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In fact, let’s make it twenty-five.
In our continuing efforts to provide you with fresh silliness delivered promptly, I will be delighted to answer the first twenty-five questions submitted in the handy “Comments” below. I’ll only edit out questions that have been answered several times before here and elsewhere, so I encourage you to come [...]

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First of all, thanks to all of you who feel that I may or may not resemble one person or another. Without you, this exercise would merely be annoying and self-indulgent. After asking you to suggest people that, in spite of my best efforts, I look nothing like, you sent in thousands (dozens) [...]

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Yes, HD-DVD is dead.
This is your last chance to purchase the hardware and then run out NOW – don’t wait – NOW, and get your HD-DVD copy of “You, Me and Dupree”. It was shocking to me, and to the industry group fronted by Toshiba, that a format anchored by “You, Me and Dupree” [...]

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Someone named Mary Jo Pehl.
…Dang, gave it away!
I guess that even in the midst of an emotional tornado, my excellent manners oblige me to refer to my fellow riffclowns by name.
Not so for you, Ms. Pehl. I’ll say only this about the Nameless Incident, then suffer in my characteristic martyr-like silence: [...]

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It’s Presidents Day. I’m off work. The sun, which has shone brightly for the previous two days hides behind clouds. I’ve just started a big crock pot full of chili that won’t be ready for several hours. I need something to do…
For the past month or so, my neighbor, a WGA [...]

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True.
Japanese? Of course.
Clowns?* No.
(* including “clowny clown” clowns.)

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