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Genuine Hidden-Camera Video of My First Date, Ever.

April 6th, 2008 by Kevin Murphy · 17 Comments



Of course it’s me on the left. And yes, “Desperado” was our song. The relationship didn’t last; I can’t be sure, but I think she wanted to hurt me.

Tags: Bill · Kevin · Mike · RiffTrax · Riffer Blogs · music

17 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Casey on Apr 6, 2008 at 7:13 pm

    I envy the fact that you were in this relationship long enough to have an “our song.”

  • 2 MikeP on Apr 6, 2008 at 7:21 pm

    Once again, technically you had first date crotch contact. Greater men have bragged about less.

  • 3 Dan Noutko-Kennedy on Apr 6, 2008 at 7:22 pm

    Every day for the last 30 years this exact same image has spun perpetually like a zoetrope inside my skull as my first date plays hacky sack with my manhood over and over again. The only difference is the accompanying soundtrack is The J. Geils Band’s “Love Stinks”.

  • 4 Gerald Shields on Apr 6, 2008 at 8:37 pm

    Wow. So your wife kicked you in the nuts . . . again, again and again ad nauseam

  • 5 ShutterBun on Apr 6, 2008 at 8:57 pm

    You were so much less hirsute back then, Kevein. (but then, weren’t we all at that age)

  • 6 Onil on Apr 6, 2008 at 11:31 pm

    That was so lovely. I think I’m gonna cry.

  • 7 Ryan on Apr 7, 2008 at 4:56 am

    This must be a deleted scene from “What to do on a Date”

  • 8 Courtney on Apr 7, 2008 at 6:34 am

    Everyone’s assuming you’re the large hairy fellow. I’m taking the high road and assuming you’re the one in the red pants and that the bear just got a little bit fresh.

  • 9 Kevin Murphy on Apr 7, 2008 at 10:49 am

    No, no, not my wife, this was my first date. My wife has never kicked me in the nuts so many times in a row.


  • 10 R.A. Roth on Apr 7, 2008 at 12:04 pm

    Hunters and groin violence on bears, oh my!


  • 11 Mr. Slick on Apr 7, 2008 at 12:48 pm

    He seemed like a nice man, did you two ever meet up again?

  • 12 SEISMIC on Apr 7, 2008 at 1:29 pm

    Who would want to kick Kevin in the nuts-honestly?!?!

  • 13 RemmieBarrow on Apr 7, 2008 at 4:33 pm

    Hopefully you wore a cup.

  • 14 Libby on Apr 14, 2008 at 7:32 am

    I could watch that all day.

  • 15 bopdilly on Nov 16, 2008 at 3:59 am

    Excellent site! I wish the owner to develop and please all!

  • 16 videoonlinego on Nov 17, 2008 at 3:34 pm

    It is not out-of-date information? Because I have other data on this theme.

  • 17 Alec Rozsa on Apr 27, 2011 at 1:55 am

    WMG Blocked this? Who do they think they are! I got all excited haha damn them and they’re copyright.