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Finally. FINALLY, I say!

June 25th, 2008 by Bill Corbett · 40 Comments

Sweet relief. What took you so long, David?

    david hasselhoff

    DH: ready to social network your ass.

Introducing Hoffspace, for all your social networking needs. (…Related to David Hasselhoff, which most social networking needs are, anyway.)

Downloadable Wendy’s Stack Attack Burgers soon available!

Tags: RiffTrax

40 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Ninjew on Jun 25, 2008 at 6:32 pm

    MAN! You mean that I – *I* – could get my own personalized Hoff-Bag?!

    I can’t believe it!

    FINALLY something that’ll make scooping up the cat litter less of a chore!

  • 2 Axnollouse on Jun 25, 2008 at 6:32 pm

    So Bill how hard are you going to profess your love of the Hoff on his site. A ton or a metric ton?

  • 3 MikeP on Jun 25, 2008 at 6:44 pm

    The Hoff: The Real Original Techno Viking

  • 4 Onil on Jun 25, 2008 at 6:58 pm

    I wonder how long it’ll take until it’s overrun by sexual predators just like MySpace.

  • 5 Doktorsleepless on Jun 25, 2008 at 7:11 pm

    And once again someone steals one of my golden ideas!

  • 6 Glyn on Jun 25, 2008 at 7:43 pm

    This is a very dangerous trend.
    What if every run of the mill celebrity started doing this?
    Think of the deluge of wasted and precious Internet space!
    [insert voice of the late DeForest Kelley]
    ‘My God man, do you realize what this means?’[voice off]
    What if Joe Don Baker launched a site?
    I’m not going to fill out a new profile for every site I visit!
    Not that I would intentionally visit a JDB site, but you can’t trust some links and accidents do happen!

  • 7 Tim on Jun 25, 2008 at 8:16 pm

    Bill, I’ll go ahead and thank you profusely for using that picture of Hasselhoff, and not the dreaded “Hasselhoff in leather jacket and bikini briefs” photo that so many tend to use. I wasn’t really in the mood to vomit.

  • 8 Courtney on Jun 25, 2008 at 8:22 pm

    If Guttenberg’s not doing it, it might as well not even exist.

  • 9 NotMerrittStone on Jun 25, 2008 at 8:49 pm

    This is why facebook never appealed to me.

    A distinct lack of Hoff.

  • 10 Mr. Slick on Jun 25, 2008 at 9:20 pm

    Dare to Dream!

  • 11 To_Servo_Man on Jun 25, 2008 at 9:43 pm

    Coincidentally, that’s precisely why square dancing has never appealed to me.

  • 12 euphoriafish on Jun 25, 2008 at 10:05 pm

    I hate David Hasselhoff, but I totally want a Hoff Bag!

  • 13 Brian O. on Jun 25, 2008 at 10:36 pm

    But will it sell in Germany?

  • 14 chrismartindeed on Jun 26, 2008 at 12:47 am

    Somewhere out there, a delighted SpongeBob SquarePants must be squealing like a schoolgirl and yelling “Pinch Me!”

  • 15 Russ Rogers on Jun 26, 2008 at 3:20 am

    Remember how stupid and lame Adam West seemed before he was hip and cool again? And yes, Adam West was lame (late seventies to early nineties) and is totally cool again. The Hoff is still in that lame phase. He needs to some voice work in animation, dry out a bit more and show the world he isn’t SO damn full of himself.

    OK, The Hoff is SO full of himself. He is “The Hoff!” This is a social networking site built on the fundamental question, “How do I fit into this Universe where the Hoff is the center? How far away do I want to set my satellite?”

    Why can’t we get a social networking site built around somebody I WANT to spend my life revolving around…like William Shatner!

  • 16 Tim D on Jun 26, 2008 at 4:23 am

    Or laminated counter tops. No Hoff there either.

  • 17 Amanda on Jun 26, 2008 at 5:08 am

    Because the unfortunate site name would be Shatspace and there’s just too many jokes to be made.

  • 18 Ben on Jun 26, 2008 at 5:11 am

    So what about this Castle Hoffenstein or whatever it is that he supposedly wants to buy? He said he wanted a castle to debut his new album in.

    Ol’ Hoffie didn’t say what part of the castle, but I am guessing it will be in the torture room somewhere between the rack and iron maiden.

    Of course, the castle acoustics won’t work for him, but I figure his ideal environment would be at the bottom of the lowest mine shaft and the Hoffmeister realized that people may not want to pay to see him perform there…and couldn’t be forced there at gunpoint either.

  • 19 Bill Corbett on Jun 26, 2008 at 6:09 am

    “Because the unfortunate site name would be Shatspace and there‚Äôs just too many jokes to be made.”

    Oh, I wish I hadn’t read that while drinking coffee. I did a genuine Danny Thomas spit take.

  • 20 Rob T Firefly on Jun 26, 2008 at 6:20 am

    Somewhere, the star of “Street Hawk” is wiping away the latest in a long line of silent, solitary tears.

  • 21 Tim D on Jun 26, 2008 at 6:53 am

    So, the coffee the shat out of your mouth, then?

    I’m sorry.

  • 22 Tim D on Jun 26, 2008 at 6:54 am

    **** RE TYPED TO FIX GRAMMATICALL ERROR****

    So the coffee shat out of your mouth, then?

    I’m sorry, again.

  • 23 seanf on Jun 26, 2008 at 7:34 am

    Bill– you get only one warning:

    DON’T HASSLE THE HOFF.

  • 24 To_Servo_Man on Jun 26, 2008 at 9:15 am

    Don’t forget the Horsehead Nebula — the lack of Hoff in deep space is really quite off-putting.

  • 25 Botchinator on Jun 26, 2008 at 9:17 am

    Hey, do they have a template where you can get a picture with hoff while blitzed on booze?

  • 26 Teaser on Jun 26, 2008 at 9:38 am

    …….and Don’t Chuck The NORRIS

  • 27 Teaser on Jun 26, 2008 at 9:41 am

    Geez,my spelling is awful..I need to contact the Hoff for some spelling Lessons,me thinks

  • 28 Glyn on Jun 26, 2008 at 9:48 am

    What’s next?
    Celebrity State Quarters?
    Hoff on one side Kitt on the other?

  • 29 Andy McGaffigan on Jun 26, 2008 at 10:18 am

    I’m hoping that liberal blogger Arianna Huffington will open”HuffSpace” and that the two sites enter into a Thunderdome-style fight to the death.

  • 30 seanf on Jun 26, 2008 at 10:49 am

    And, whatever you do, DON’T, errr, CORBETT THE BILL.

    Wait, wait. I’ve got a better one. ALWAYS corBETT ON BILL.

    OK, I think I may have just referenced myself into a corner.

  • 31 RemmieBarrow on Jun 26, 2008 at 1:39 pm

    Are you kidding? The way the Germans love Hoff, it will probably be filled up in a nanosecond.

  • 32 Amanda on Jun 26, 2008 at 2:05 pm

    Oops! Sorry Bill. I have a tendency to ruin many people’s keyboards that way.

  • 33 Amanda on Jun 26, 2008 at 2:12 pm

    You know what I most love about that picture above? It’s not the ‘I’ve just been to the Fuckparade 2ooo and protected Dayglo girls’ glare from the Hoff himself. No, it’s Mr. Smug in the background. Mr. I Just Handled the Hoff’s 2007 Tax Returns for H & R Block So Suck It! guy. What on earth does he really have to be so smug about?

  • 34 wakachiwaka on Jun 26, 2008 at 4:30 pm

    Well, he’s been busy, what with inventing the printing press and all.

  • 35 NotMerrittStone on Jun 26, 2008 at 6:31 pm

    And don’t get me started on the shower. I have such a hard time showering since there’s such a lack of…

    Perhaps I’ve said too much.

  • 36 To_Servo_Man on Jun 26, 2008 at 6:49 pm

    Or not enough. Grrrr….

  • 37 Hugh on Jun 26, 2008 at 11:56 pm

    Life’s too short to hate David Hasselhoff.

  • 38 Rob’s blog of posts » Possible Hoff-hassling imminent on Jun 27, 2008 at 8:56 am

    [...] More info at Switched, as featured on the Rifftrax blog. [...]

  • 39 Henk on Jul 7, 2008 at 12:13 am

    Sooo, what are you wearing?

  • 40 Henk on Jul 7, 2008 at 12:15 am

    Vomit, hmm, what are you wearing?