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Rot in Hell, Scrabble Express Handheld Electronic Scrabble Game!

June 29th, 2008 by · 30 Comments

512ERV21K2L. SL500 AA280My Scrabble Express Handheld Electronic Scrabble game and I have always had a rocky relationship. I have long wanted it to rot in hell, it refuses to. So I have reluctantly allowed it to stay around. For many years that meant it was stowed away in a box in the garage along with a broken pair of biking sunglasses and a special wrench that can only be used on something I no longer own (nor can I remember what it was.) Recently my son dragged it out again and once more its pervasive evil has crept its way, much like Uncle Ponto*, back into my life.

Just moments ago I was, as I do most times, whomping ass on the cursed little thing when it threaded into the corner, for a triple word score, mind you, the word “xyst”. This is just one of many hundreds of made up words in the Scrabble dictionary (others include xi, juga, nu, cwm and on and on), but I had never been done in by it before.

So I promise you, makers of the Scrabble Express Handheld Electronic Scrabble game, 800 million xu if you can tell me honestly that you or any other editor of the scrabble dictionary has ever heard or read a single usage of the word xyst.

So confident am I that none exist that I will not even bother to look it up.

Come on makers of the Scrabble Express Handheld Electronic Scrabble game, your 800 million xu await you (and that’s a lot of dong!)

*An evil little pointy-headed “familiar” described by one of the possessed people in the harrowing book Hostage to the Devil: The Possession and Exorcism of Five Contemporary Americans

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