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Let the hazing begin!

August 22nd, 2008 by · 33 Comments

There’s some new talent over at RiffTrax helping us to kick off our iRiffs section. Our thanks to Josh Way, Incognito Cinema Warriors XP, and Riff Raff Theater for some very funny stuff (and more to come, right guys…?)

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So, what is iRiffs (besides being a painfully derivative name, I hear you saying, so just stop it)? It’s your chance to make a RiffTrax, share it with the world, and then bath in the bathtubs full of money you’ll make off it. (All the info you need is on the iRiffs page.)

Now, on to the hazing. As any of our new talent can tell you, the easiest part of the day-long ritual is being roused from your bed at 3:00AM by fire extinguishers and potato guns (fired directly into your face at point blank range. HA! New meat!) Then, after a light and ironic breakfast of fried potatoes, your choice of juice, coffee, skim milk or a serious ass-kicking, you’ll be blindfolded, taken to an undisclosed location (probably the alley behind the Green Burrito very near RiffTrax World Headquarters), tossed a box full of various costume pieces and ordered, sharply, to dress as your favorite cast member of “Gary Unmarried”. Get it wrong and you die.* After that, 20 minutes or so of uncomfortable silences and strained conversation as we try to think up something else to do, then we break for a restorative lunch of hoppy beers – while you sit there WATCHING! Drinking the hoppy beer OF YOUR CHOICE! And it’s ON US so DON’T EVEN TRY TO PAY!

Then, naps all around, we bum a ride back to RiffTrax in your car, and Bob’s your uncle, you’re one of the RiffTrax team!

Join us, won’t you?

*Don’t worry, you won’t die. There is no wrong answer.

Tags: RiffTrax