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September 9th, 2008 by Conor Lastowka · 13 Comments


As I’m sure many of you often do, I was browsing the wikipedia entry for my high school today.  Probably about four years ago, my friend Greg Harrell-Edge and I decided to exploit this new Wikipedia thing and add ourselves to the “notable alumni” section.  (Note: The section includes the screenwriter of Ben Affleck’s “Reindeer Games” and the kid that George Allen referred to as “Macaca.”)  To keep it free of bias, I added Greg, who had recently been deemed “The Laziest Man in America” by Jimmy Kimmel Live, and he added me, as “The Creator of National High Five Day.”  I believe the goal was to see who would be removed first by the svelte, tanned wikipedia gatekeepers, therein sealing forever the others claim as the “more notable.”

We had a good run of several years on the list, but looking at it today, I noticed we were gone.  The talk page confirms that this deletion too place over a year ago, when my newest enemy Vamoom so eloquently stated:

This section is, in my opinion, full of not-so-notable alumni. Anyone can become notable for whatever reason. The notable alumni section should highlight the strengths of the school in academics and related areas. For example, neither Greg Harrell-Edge (deemed the “Laziest Man In America” by the TV show Jimmy Kimmel Live) nor Conor Lastowka (founder of National High Five Day) should be there. Neither is well heard of and neither has a significant accomplishment. I am sure there are others, but these are just examples. 

Rarely does one have his notability questioned in such a damning manner.  At a time like this, one has two options: A.)  Tuck your tail between your legs and retreat from the public eye.  Or B.)  Launch a high profile campaign to affirm my notability so I get back on the list and Greg doesn’t.  Any canon law experts with experience navigating the the minutiae of Wikipedia rules and regulations is welcome to assist my cause on the Discussion page.

Tags: RiffTrax · people conor will see in hell

13 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Ryan on Sep 9, 2008 at 8:40 am

    Conor, you are a contributor to a business with a sizable fanbase and comunity that knows your name. I think that qualifies you to be on that list.

    Also, can you get me The Laziest Man in America’s autograph?

  • 2 karen on Sep 9, 2008 at 8:57 am

    i would concur. you are famous b/c you work with a cool website. can’t get any better than that!

  • 3 Charlie W on Sep 9, 2008 at 9:19 am

    I choose option b. Also Vamoom is a douche.

  • 4 Propaniac on Sep 9, 2008 at 9:47 am

    I live in northern Virginia, and in the time I’ve been reading this blog and your posts, it feels like the hints in regard to where you grew up have been honing in closer and closer to my own house. TJ is five minutes away from me–it’s where I vote!

    I fully expect a post from you in the future about how you used to spy on your weird next-door neighbors as a kid, and then you’ll go on to describe people who sound exactly like me and my family.

  • 5 Doug on Sep 9, 2008 at 11:55 am

    If we do this, will you stop trying to be funny here?

  • 6 Barry on Sep 9, 2008 at 2:10 pm

    Good luck with that. If you can find a reliable, verifiable third-party source establishing your notability, then there should be no problem keeping your name on that page.

  • 7 Rob T Firefly on Sep 9, 2008 at 2:39 pm

    I once had a fairly detailed Wikipedia article written about me by Internet strangers who thought I was notable, and later the entry itself was deleted by a different bunch of Internet strangers who thought I was non-notable. Both experiences were fun.

  • 8 Jmaes on Sep 9, 2008 at 6:52 pm

    Doesn’t the April 28, 2006, Wall Street Journal article profiling you and your world famous RBI Baseball World Series Game 6 You Tube video, and all the other media articles about it, establish your notability?

    I haven’t read anything about Vamoom anywhere other than in his Wikipedia editing notes.

  • 9 Conor Lastowka on Sep 9, 2008 at 7:00 pm

    Nice. I’m from Vienna, but spent many an extended evening in the TJ surrounding area, mainly the area between it and the Bradlick shopping center. It’s quite possible that I came by your house to trick or treat well after I was way too old for it.

  • 10 Conor Lastowka on Sep 9, 2008 at 7:01 pm

    The Laziest Man in America just quit his job and moved to Florida to work his ass off on a political campaign. Seems like the title, and therefore any shred of his notability, are long gone.

  • 11 Conor Lastowka on Sep 9, 2008 at 7:02 pm

    It’s Vamoom! Run!

  • 12 Lord Bob on Sep 11, 2008 at 12:46 pm

    This is a travesty, Conor. I think that, as a prime source of… wait, which one of Mike, Kevin, and Bill are you again?

  • 13 Laziest Man In The World on Jan 27, 2009 at 10:39 am

    Laziest man in a country is easy.

    Not notable.