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Rogenomics 101 Part 2: The Hill Curve

September 9th, 2008 by · 13 Comments

One of the most exciting aspects of Rogenomics is its ability to adapt to new Hollywood trends yet remain the most accurate predictor of their outcome. Last time we observed some basic principles; now let’s observe one of the recent additions to the pantheon of Leading Rogenomic Indicators (LRI’s), Jonah Hill. Jonah has dependably served major Rogenomic models as a null integer – a place-holding cypher with no intrinsic value of his own. When plotted on a grid, His presence in movies has no perceivable effect on the success or failure of said film.

Hill Curve Adjusted

(The apparent anomaly occurring around Walk Hard is commonly explained by the Meadows Effect hypothesis, which argues that any movie featuring Tim Meadows will see a significant across-the-board downturn in quality and performance.)

However, recent developments in Rogenomic theory are predicting a gradual realignment and possible convergence of LRI’s which will have a powerful impact on the future of filmed entertainment. Take a look at this corollary to the Hornet Theorem:

seth prog 1

Not to suggest that Seth Rogen will reverse in age or height; keep in mind that this progression moves in both directions. This is accepted to indicate that if conditions persist, one of several outcomes are possible: Seth Rogen will become Jonah Hill; Jonah Hill will become Seth Rogen; or the two will merge in a sort of Superseth Convergence, the outcome of which is wildly unstable and possibly dangerous. However, the supposition that existing conditions will persist is called into question by the following probability:

hills prob

This of course follows the Sizemorean Curve and applies the Nolte Rule, both of which create unknowns in typical outcomes and increase the standard deviation.  Yet in fact, real-world proof, both of progression and probability, has been observed in the field:

judd apatow02

This trend, while neither inevitable nor irreversable, tends to support the general principle that schlubs will always move toward a state of inertia. Next time we will discuss the declining influence of Sandlerian Rogenomics and the surprising accuracy of the Rule of Sequels.

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