41 responses so far ↓

• 1 Charlie W on Oct 1, 2008 at 7:11 pm

  hopefully these snooty women will die of a botched plastic surgery. I’m not holding my breath though.

• 2 Ariel on Oct 1, 2008 at 7:22 pm

  Where is my martini?

• 3 Jeffrey Thames [King of Grief] on Oct 1, 2008 at 8:35 pm

  It should be noted that one of the running themes in the Richie Rich comics was that Gloria would never accept expensive gifts from Richie. Where are her kind today?

• 4 Heather on Oct 1, 2008 at 8:39 pm

  Oh, look– there goes an outfit that cost more than the annual GDP of Myanmar! Barely covering $18,000 of plastic surgery! I’d forgotten how much it costs to look like a late 70s/early 80s cheap hooker-bag lady-farm girl-prom date hybrid. Clearly it was all worth it, just to see the look on Amelia Jenks Bloomer’s face.

• 5 Eeliza on Oct 1, 2008 at 9:24 pm

  I felt a bit old and unhip (and I’m not even 30) when I first opened the link and realized that I recognized maybe three of those girls…but the feeling was brief and I am now terribly proud of myself for not following any of this celebrity mularkey on a regular basis. A hearty HUZZAH to everyone who can name more former presidents than billionaire heiresses (no, you shouldn’t do it right now, that was rhetorical ).

• 6 Mr. Slick on Oct 1, 2008 at 9:56 pm

  Bacon makes everything better, assuming we can still afford it.

• 7 justhesh on Oct 2, 2008 at 12:00 am

  Just keep thinking of the kittens, Bill. Nothing but kittens.

  Now hide them before Sarah Palin gets here.

• 8 Neb on Oct 2, 2008 at 12:27 am

  As an antidote to web sites like that, may I recommend web sites like this: http://www.gofugyourself.com

• 9 Neb on Oct 2, 2008 at 12:44 am

  Specifically: http://gofugyourself.celebuzz.com/go_fug_yourself/2008/09/and_who_am_i_ill_never_fug.html

• 10 Melman on Oct 2, 2008 at 2:37 am

  I didn’t recognise any of them, and I’m not even 20 yet.

• 11 Stacia on Oct 2, 2008 at 2:48 am

  Good grief, black pantyhose ARE back in style. I thought someone was joking with me last week.

  Why is the RiffTrax blog such a source of unending horror for me? First the spiders, then the pig, now this.

• 12 Casey on Oct 2, 2008 at 3:36 am

  I imagine that is why Bill put the bacon martini at the end of the post.. to balance out the horror of the content.

  Had he not done that.. my morning would have probably been ruined.

• 13 andrew on Oct 2, 2008 at 4:20 am

  Celebrity (or, in most cases, pseudo-celebrity) photos?

  My favorite of late has been Metallica’s shopping trip.

• 14 Martha Stewart on Oct 2, 2008 at 5:37 am

  Bill,
  Take care when cooking bacon for your rasher of scrumptious martinis that you don’t spatter hot grease on your Vera Wang.

• 15 blablover5 on Oct 2, 2008 at 6:24 am

  All this talk of bacon really makes me wonder what about the sausage?

  Won’t somebody please think of the sausage?

• 16 Ben on Oct 2, 2008 at 6:51 am

  Ah, the wealthy. The Houston Chronicle produced several articles about their inspirational handling of the recent hurricane unpleasantness. This was the most bile-inducing one…

  http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/hurricane/ike/6020887.html

• 17 Tim on Oct 2, 2008 at 7:22 am

  We are moving towards using bacon as a currency, right?

  I haven’t been hoarding tightly-banded stacks of bacon in my safe at home for nothing, right?

  Right?

• 18 Scooter on Oct 2, 2008 at 8:33 am

  copy + paste Melman’s response

• 19 Onil on Oct 2, 2008 at 8:42 am

  But Bill, as a SELLOUT, isn’t this the tax bracket that you’re trying to get into? Will we ever see a picture of you staring vacantly standing in front of a Prada sign or watch you on tv answering some E! douchebag’s question about who you’re wearing?

• 20 Auntie Maim on Oct 2, 2008 at 9:06 am

  So, if those heiresses were wearing bacon dresses, would all be forgiven?

• 21 Katai on Oct 2, 2008 at 9:06 am

  Are you kidding? This is downright classy compared to … oh … TMZ, Defamer, Perez Hilton, anything spewing forth at my eyeballs while I’m waiting in line at the grocery store, etc.

• 22 kt on Oct 2, 2008 at 9:11 am

  Frightening! But don’t let it get you down. Nobody wants to wait for the hurricane to pass with a couple who goes by the name Thrasher and can afford $2,400 for one night in a hotel. They sound like the kind of people who make others cry because it’s fun to watch.

• 23 Nanobots on Oct 2, 2008 at 9:25 am

  That theme is why the Richie Rich series was much much more popular with boys than with girls.

• 24 Bill Corbett on Oct 2, 2008 at 9:33 am

  Katai,

  I’d never defend the nasty gossip rags. But at least they’re not treating their subjects with reverence, and implying that they’re royalty.

• 25 Bill Corbett on Oct 2, 2008 at 9:42 am

  “So, if those heiresses were wearing bacon dresses, would all be forgiven?”

  Yes, under the following conditions:

  1) Heiresses change out of bacon dresses, with all proper modesty. (GOOD: In dressing room. BAD: In back of limo, with paparazzi taking pictures.)

  2) Change into shapeless sackcloth garments.

  3) Leave dressing room, put bacon dresses into frying pan.

  4) Serve bacon to me.

  When I have had my fill*, then Forgiveness.

  (* not an easy step to reach, lest you think I am Too Forgiving)

• 26 R.A. Roth on Oct 2, 2008 at 10:04 am

  So, are any of those delicious lovelies heirs to the Comstock Bacon Mine in Montana? If so, grrrrrrr, sign me up!

  Randy

• 27 MST3Kelly on Oct 2, 2008 at 11:52 am

  these women bring to mind over-bred little dogs, living victims of unfortunate genetic tampering in the search for ‘perfection.’ a few are so hideously thin that they seem about to faint away from the weight of their hand-sewn couture gowns.

  I do like the name ‘Tinsley Mortimer,’ though.

• 28 Smuttynose on Oct 2, 2008 at 12:08 pm

  A good name for a cat.

• 29 Smuttynose on Oct 2, 2008 at 12:08 pm

  Or an over-bred little shaky dog.

• 30 MST3Kelly on Oct 2, 2008 at 12:11 pm

  ‘Oh no- Daddy! Tinsley swallowed my Chanel cell-phone charm!’

• 31 Smuttynose on Oct 2, 2008 at 12:30 pm

  “We’ll get you two more of each, sweetie.”

• 32 MST3Kelly on Oct 2, 2008 at 1:03 pm

  ‘Thanks, Daddy. They were both getting really OLD, anyways. I’ve had them for like, two whole weeks now.’

• 33 Auntie Maim on Oct 2, 2008 at 1:24 pm

  Those people obviously have no idea that their “neighbors” are spending their days clearing limbs & debris, with little hope of a hot shower, living on canned food and spending their nights swatting mosquitos in a lantern-lit steaming hot house–or pile of lumber.

  I’ll bet if they did know that, they’d be right over there with blenders & tequila. They probably wouldn’t even think to bring bacon, though.

• 34 Auntie Maim on Oct 2, 2008 at 1:25 pm

  I just saw a bacon wallet somewhere…maybe it was geekologie.

• 35 Auntie Maim on Oct 2, 2008 at 1:26 pm

  …a cartoon cat.

• 36 RemmieBarrow on Oct 2, 2008 at 2:14 pm

  Where’s my bacon?

• 37 Heather on Oct 2, 2008 at 3:18 pm

  Tinsley sounds like a can opener. And Tinsley Mortimer makes much more sense as a name for a socialite when you realize that her maiden name is Snerd.

• 38 Mr. Slick on Oct 2, 2008 at 10:14 pm

  I guess bacon can only do so much. Though if they wore bacon dresses they would probably get the bacon greasey, with a weird smell to it too.

  I do agree with Bill… as long as he’s willing to share the baconey goodness

• 39 Gamera on Oct 3, 2008 at 1:45 am

  Where’s that McDonalds guy when you need him? He’d know what to do.

  http://cbs2.com/local/Line.Cutter.McDonalds.2.829820.html

• 40 Katai on Oct 3, 2008 at 3:25 pm

  Eh, fair point.

• 41 Peter on Jul 26, 2011 at 1:05 pm

  I think this website is obnoxious as well http://www.thomaskramer.com

Leave a Comment