Many people, obviously envious of the path I’ve taken for Bacon Stupidity Month have asked me how they might undertake a similar course. It may seem impossibly complex, almost Byzantine at first: you – what? – eat bacon? for a month? how? Where am I? Help! But it’s really quite simple. First, go get one of these.
Have you got one? Good. Now just turn it into this.
Then broil or fry it and eat it to the exclusion of everything else!
(By the way, these ends and pieces, essentially the floor sweepings from the bacon factory, were surprisingly good, and for $1.99 a pound! Not only that, the phrase “ends and pieces” is so poetic, I’ve chosen it as the title of my autobiography, which is currently being ghost written in India somewhere.)
I forgot to show the intermediate step: