But then one thing lead to another, Kevin started doing his impression of Barbra Streisand at the end of “A Star is Born”; Bill started doing his impression of Kris Kristofferson at the beginning, middle and end of “A Star is Born”; Conor began throwing pennies at both of them. I missed most of it because I was shouting at and cuffing this oaf who insulted my Schnappi shirt (which turned out to be a coat rack).
The result: we think Kevin is dead, again. Bill phoned from somewhere in Regina, Saskatchewan, and Conor is still there, pumping one of those empty kegs. And me, I woke up on top of a Toshiba 2300c color copier at a Kinko’s somewhere. I’m going to go outside when I’m done typing this and scrounge up some pants. If you see me, could tell me where I am? Thanks.
***Uptated by Kevin March 18th***
Not dead, just fine, right as rain, only one question – where, and why, did I acquire the tattoo of Bill Bixby on my right butt cheek, and what happened to my pants? It’s for the police report.