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Saturday Night Zodiac Cabaret!

April 18th, 2009 by Bill Corbett · 55 Comments

I know it’s a bold move to post this here… but I was born on March 30th, which makes me an Aries. Therefore I am, I am, I am the ram. I am, I am, I am the ram. I am, I am, I am the ram. I am, I am the ram*.

(*Mickey Rourke = imposter)

Tags: RiffTrax

55 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Erica on Apr 18, 2009 at 6:37 pm

    I used my own Aries boldness (March 26) to boldly turn it off after “I will lead the parade….”

    Damn, I’m daring! What will I do next?

  • 2 Barry on Apr 18, 2009 at 6:44 pm

    Hey, I know this is off-topic, but could somebody tell Mike that bacon beats steel?

  • 3 peri on Apr 18, 2009 at 6:54 pm

    What could we have possibly done to deserve this?

  • 4 Bill Corbett on Apr 18, 2009 at 6:54 pm

    I salute your even-bolder boldness!

  • 5 Erica on Apr 18, 2009 at 6:59 pm

    Thank you!! I return the salute! I feel just like barbecue sauce!

  • 6 Erica on Apr 18, 2009 at 7:01 pm

    ::::whispering:::: We made fun of the wax figures…

  • 7 peri on Apr 18, 2009 at 7:04 pm

    dammit! We give!

    ahem…Please sir, may we have some more wax figures?

  • 8 pjwaldron on Apr 18, 2009 at 7:10 pm

    My dog is running in circles and barking at the cruel, cruel machine that is emitting these foul noises–she doesn’t understand the words, but she can sense the aura of evil wrongness.

  • 9 rebisaz on Apr 18, 2009 at 7:41 pm

    Is this all some.. experiment?

  • 10 Katie Jane on Apr 18, 2009 at 7:51 pm

    Is it just me, or was that wax figure singing?

  • 11 Queen Shadowrama on Apr 18, 2009 at 8:01 pm

    I love how us Leos (the most vain, center of attention loving, glamorous people on the planet) were just represented here by a creepy furry lady wearing TWO DIFFERENT KINDS OF ANIMAL PRINT.

    It is an insult to our kind!

  • 12 jfe on Apr 18, 2009 at 8:28 pm

    Me thinks Mr. Corbett was not really looking at or listening to the singer.

  • 13 Kim on Apr 18, 2009 at 8:29 pm

    I suspect the title “Saturday Night Zodiac Cabaret!” was enough to inspire a RiffTrax blog post.

  • 14 rebisaz on Apr 18, 2009 at 8:42 pm


  • 15 jenifersf on Apr 18, 2009 at 9:21 pm

    I boldly turned it off right then, too! And I’m a Libra! What does that mean?

  • 16 jenifersf on Apr 18, 2009 at 9:22 pm

    I think I have seen this before! Like, before the internet existed! Where could it have been?

  • 17 Quilted Porcupine on Apr 18, 2009 at 10:43 pm

    On the upside, this video could single-handedly bring about an end to astrology.

  • 18 Melinda on Apr 18, 2009 at 11:50 pm

    This, of course, being the logical progression from Mr. B Natural…

  • 19 Rev on Apr 19, 2009 at 2:43 am

    Harvey Sid Fisher!

    A friend of mine actually used to be a backup singer for him.

  • 20 Erica on Apr 19, 2009 at 3:17 am

    Libras are all about balance, so it was wise of you to turn off that which disrupted balance. You are the polar opposite of Aries (on the Zodiac) so it’s only sensible :)

  • 21 Erica on Apr 19, 2009 at 3:19 am

    It has some sort of PBS / creepy performance art feel. It almost seemed like the Electric Company, only instead of it being cool, it was terrifying.

  • 22 Erica on Apr 19, 2009 at 3:20 am

    That’s probably the first time that “logic” and “Mr. B Natural” were used in the same sentence. :)

  • 23 AJ on Apr 19, 2009 at 3:59 am

    I had to wait for it all to load before skipping to the last sign…p,p,p pisces…p,p,p pisces….

    I think I’ll go walk into traffic now.

  • 24 Walter Kovacs on Apr 19, 2009 at 5:21 am

    I am apparently a moonchild …

    I was quite disturbed to find I “like to receive”.

    Then again I could have been a genemi who likes to watch …

  • 25 fauxarbres on Apr 19, 2009 at 5:27 am

    Libalibalibra… My sign gets the unfortunate visual of this guy stroking himself. It’s true that I like Diet Coke, though… AMAZING!

  • 26 fauxarbres on Apr 19, 2009 at 5:35 am

    Let’s face it, this video is an insult to all our kind. As in, people with eyes and ears.

  • 27 jenifersf on Apr 19, 2009 at 9:32 am

    Makes sense! :)

  • 28 jenifersf on Apr 19, 2009 at 9:38 am

    I just watched the part. Thought the guy was HAVING a stroke.

  • 29 Remmie Barrow on Apr 19, 2009 at 9:59 am

    Wow…this song was really “bully bull…bull”.

  • 30 Alex on Apr 19, 2009 at 10:08 am

    Originally saw this guy when i went to see this live at the found footage film festival, I also saw Jan Terri there as well, there needs to be a team up between the two of you.

  • 31 Sparkys Girl on Apr 19, 2009 at 10:13 am

    While it was more than a little difficult to continue watching, I had to know what “my” song would be. Now I can hang my head in shame while I sing “Virgoooooooooo, Virgooo-oooooo, Virgoooooo-ooooo-oooo.” Followed by my version. “Please Nooooooooo! Please Noooooo-ooooo! Please Noooooooo-oooo-oooooo!!!”

  • 32 clarimoto on Apr 19, 2009 at 10:26 am

    I just wonder how someone comes up with the idea and execution of such a video. Was it preplanned, got funding, stemmed from a company called, Bringing Astrology to the Masses, or just one crazy night with a couple people sitting around saying ‘Well, I know a couple girls who can dance, and you have a tux…now all we need is a couple cases of cough syrup to drink for inspiration and we’ll have GOLD!’

  • 33 Erica on Apr 19, 2009 at 11:07 am

    Oh they were on something much more potent than cough syrup, for sure.

  • 34 Remmie Barrow on Apr 19, 2009 at 12:09 pm

    …Besides, I prefer “Weird Al” Yankovic’s version, “Your Horoscope For Today”.

  • 35 Walter Kovacs on Apr 19, 2009 at 1:58 pm

    They also had a camera tricks from Shatner’s “Rocketman” video.

  • 36 Houndstooth Mind on Apr 19, 2009 at 2:43 pm

    I am also a moon child. I like to give and give and give

  • 37 CrowTeeRobot on Apr 19, 2009 at 2:52 pm

    I’m having a hard time figuring out why the Gemini is country western. I don’t know a whole lot about astrological signs, but is each one appointed a style of music?

  • 38 CrowTeeRobot on Apr 19, 2009 at 2:59 pm

    I am going to make a spy movie called “Scorpio” and just use the song from this video.

  • 39 jfe on Apr 19, 2009 at 5:39 pm

    I meant that he was looking at the dancing ladies all the while.

  • 40 Margoo on Apr 19, 2009 at 6:18 pm

    Maybe that’s the worst part about being Pisces – we have to wait for the whole video in order to get to our sign, and then the song is sooo…. *shudders*

    Do you have any suggestions for traffic destinations?

  • 41 jenifersf on Apr 19, 2009 at 8:00 pm

    I concur!

  • 42 jenifersf on Apr 19, 2009 at 8:01 pm

    I didn’t watch the Gemini part, but my mom is a Gemini and she has always listened to a lot of country and western. Spooky! :P

  • 43 jfe on Apr 19, 2009 at 8:55 pm

    How come there’s ads on this site for zodiac horoscopes and watches and stuff, some kind of tie in to this video?

  • 44 Brooke on Apr 19, 2009 at 9:46 pm

    the worst thing, this poor guy was type cast the rest of his life to sing about the zodiac. Never could pull away from his break out songs…

  • 45 Dave Lewis on Apr 19, 2009 at 11:20 pm

    Oh, gotta love those Google Adsense ads–they’re automagically placed based on keywords in the page. The funniest lately were all the kettlebell-related ads, thanks to Mike’s blog entry a week ago. The Christian’s Fitness Factory “Kettlebell Blowout” was, indeed, a helluva blowout sale. I supported this site by stocking up on 20kg-ers.

  • 46 Earl Fando on Apr 20, 2009 at 5:52 am

    Bacon is never off topic.

  • 47 Earl Fando on Apr 20, 2009 at 5:53 am

    I meant for me, personally, of course. Obviously, I can’t speak for the blog.

  • 48 Jeffrey Thames [King of Grief] on Apr 20, 2009 at 8:01 pm

    Does anyone else get an early Leonard Cohen vibe from the Gemini song? (Or a latter-day Cohen vibe from the rest?)

  • 49 valdisfox on Apr 21, 2009 at 6:16 pm

    Bill, how *could* you!? I mean, I…. I saw these Harvey Sid Fisher vids somewhere around 1996 as part of a “party tape.” The memory haunted me for years, especially whenever someone said “I’m an Aires” (or, more accurately, “I am AAAAAIIRRREEEEEESSS!”). But after a dozen or so years, I finally forgot poor Harvey. Until I checked in here. It’s like being reminded of the time you threw up on someone. I’ve stuck with you guys through bad movies and shorts of all stripes, but some things are just too painful to watch. Sorry if I sound snotty. I’m a Leo. xD

  • 50 jfe on Apr 22, 2009 at 3:04 pm

    You learn something every day on rifftrax.

  • 51 jane on Apr 24, 2009 at 9:43 pm

    I want to say they showed parts of this on the Daily Show back in the 90’s…I know I’ve seen it before the internet, too.

  • 52 G on Apr 28, 2009 at 2:41 pm

    In LA this song is part of a horoscope section on Mark and Brian’s show (95.5FM)!

  • 53 Mark D on Aug 29, 2010 at 5:54 pm

    Just try to imagine what people thousands of years in the future will think of our society when they happen to “unearth” stuff like this………….sadly, when looked at in perspective, they will realize that this came from (roughly) the same century that also ‘gave’ the world Nazis, Scientology, and the cast of ‘Jersey Shore’……….and come to the inescapable conclusion that yes, there ACTUALLY was a time in Man’s past when he was NOT the most intelligent creature on planet Earth…….